Author Archives: Barb Barker

About Barb Barker

Homeschooling mom of 4 children( two with Dyslexia). Wife of Dan, my love for 118 years. Live on 60 acres in NW PA. I love Ron Paul and I'm a Christian! Never wanted kids and never wanted to homeschool!! So here I am, Four kids and a Farm!

Authenticity

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I allowed myself to be hurt today. My son told me something someone said about me. It really dug down deep. I love this person. I’ve had them at my house. I’ve fed them, taken them places,  I’ve laughed, teased, and treated them as my own. I’ve prayed for them. They told another teen they don’t like me. My son said ” mom I know sometimes I don’t act like I should, sometimes I act different in front of people. Mom this person, the change in front of others is unbelievable. “ My hurt went from hurt, to broken. Friends what are we teaching our children? 

I have watched children shovel sidewalks, open doors, pass plates, take out the church garbage and all because a parent glared at them and gave that” we are important in this church, you’d better perform, people expect it look.” All in the name of having an ordered home and being a ” godly “leader.

Don’t even tell me I’m wrong. I’m dead on. 

These children are learning how to become a chameleon. They change colors, or fronts depending on who they are around. The teen years are already so hard. People rage against Christians. I know I’m 39 and I have people on facebook who say the cruelest things about Christians. We are not allowed to believe. We are parasites.

My children are not perfect. I know their struggles. I am very open and honest with them. They know mine. They also know the thing I hate the most in this world is a fake. I want Authenticity.

Don’t tell me you are godly because you are a Pastor, Deacon, or Sunday school teacher. I know some of you, and I know your kids. Please be authentic. Your children watch how you treat them at home ,and then how you act at church or in front of the Pastor. They see right through you.

They will not serve a God who is Authentic. They will be great actors. Trust me, we don’t need more actors. That’s why the church is in this mess. 

I am starting this journey on Authenticity. If my children forsake God it won’t be because my Christianity isn’t real, it will be because they chose the world and now are the enemy of God. 

Stop being a liar. Be authentic. Our world needs you.

Forget helicopters ,we are at drone levels!

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Did you ever witness a parent in complete horror that their child is running at Mach 6 away from them? I mean what will happen if the child is let’s say ,in a gym ,with padded floors and she runs from you? I witnessed this scene last week. I know the parent probably thought,” I have such an energetic , or maybe even rebellious child”.If they only knew.

The little girl was running from you, the parents!

I also watch as some homeschooling families I know who will argue homeschoolers are sociable, completely drone their kids. They watch them with precision. If the child is hanging out with let’s say ,my children ,they use their droning skills and hone in on them. I’m not sure who should be more worried,them or me.I don’t think I have taught my kids any satanic rituals lately. Cause you know drone parents only parent by fear and control. What would happen if their child made a friend. Oh the horror!

This poor parent does not even now that this is their present state of being. They think they are growing a mighty army for the Lord. They see the hovering, hand holding ,controlling manner, as a form of righteousness. No one parents better than a drone parent. Their child must sit perfectly still in the pew and be attentive at all times. No time for being children, performance is essential. All life is scheduled. Most will have strict control of diet and strong views on the amount of time a child should sleep. Nothing interferes with THE SCHEDULE. Comply or else. 

The sad thing in these scenarios is the children suffer because it all boils down to fear. I mean what will happen if we let our children fall? They learn to rise. What happens if they make friends and learn things that you don’t expect. It’s a great time to reinforce character in your child. But but what if my child fails? Well then they have just learned one of the most important lessons in life, nobody succeeds without failure. 

At the Mother Earth News Fair ,Joel Salatin said this,  

“Anything worth doing well is worth doing poorly, at first.” 

Stop being your child’s handicap. Let them breathe.

Fifty Shades of Abuse

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I was couponing yesterday and I flipped open to the Target flyer. They were advertising for Valentine’s Day, with Fifty Shades of Grey. They show a seductive scene and Mr Grey himself appealing to whoever likes skinny, pasty,pale young men.(my husbands more of a man). I shrugged and flipped the page. I opened my news feed sometime later and someone was posting about Fifty Shades of Grey. The points were valid. It’s not love, So when is it okay for wealthy men to abuse women for sex? Etc. The problem is the warped sense of right and wrong people have. They read these blogs, they listen to the points and they go to the movie anyway. I read one comment that said” Give me a break people its just entertainment”. ( Insert sigh here)

Years ago the news came out about a very powerful man that was  seducing a young intern. People were outraged. A man in a position of power should not use it  to abuse a young girl. Other people said the girl was a variety of choice words.( of course it was her fault. )She obviously seduced him. Another Pastor fell( shocking I know) He was said to have had inappropriate relations with a very young girl. He would not even have been arrested except he brought her across state lines. He’s going to serve a long time.(Good) Just recently a member of the patriarchal movement fell. Took advantage of a young girl from 15 -22 or more. (Of course, the men in the Christian community blame the girl, oh and we should pray for him. )They don’t in the first case though because, ah well, that was Bill Clinton.  7 years ago a 16-year old friend of the family forced himself on a little girl. He threw her in the dryer and whispered that he’d cook her to death. Turned the dryer on. Someone I know had her head  bashed into the wall by her husband. She has hearing trouble in that ear to this day. (That occurred in front of other men, Marines, in fact) Disgusting isn’t it. The thing is in every situation, consensual or not, there was a sense of dominance and submission.

Let me add sexy music to those scenes. Does it make it entertainment? Don’t you think most everyone involved here would love to go back and rewrite history.? I know I would. Despite what professionals and well-meaning people tell you, you don’t just get over it or get it all out of our system”. There is no off button on  your mind. God designed our mind with trigger warnings to protect us. Sometimes it’s more than we can bare.

So now you might be saying this is not the same thing. I gave you the benefit of the doubt and googled the pdf for the book. I will not read any of the areas that get into vivid sex scenes. It would be very unhealthy for me. I don’t want to go down that road, at all. I’m skimming. I see a very insecure young girl. She likes books and does not think she is all that pretty. Christian Grey is a handsome billionaire. Let’s all just stop right there. Let’s change the ages a little. make Anastasia 18. Then let Mr.Grey do what he does to Ana. Do you still think that is okay? Make it your teenage daughter or your sister. Is that the kind of man you want her to be with?  Oh, wait you see Ana knows it’s right because she gets this “charge” of electricity and that’s how she knows she wants to have sex with him.(Insert another sigh here) Which up to this point she never has. I posted an article on my facebook the other day. You can read it here: https://www.facebook.com/danbarbdjsc/posts/10204915159093460

The desire for that lifestyle starts somewhere…Porn aka; Fifty Shades, is not harmless.

I would like you to consider the atrocities we hear on the news about women in other cultures. The abuse, the rape. We are appalled, yet we here in America worship and glorify it on the big screen? Sex trafficking is at alarming numbers( they should be at 0) http://www.8daysfilm.org/

Writing a book or producing a movie that tells people that violent sex towards women is okay, is unfathomable. He does not just have sex ( outside of marriage) but he uses whips and actually beats her to where she’s scared. She’s afraid to say anything because she does not want him to leave her.Hello? Folks that is not love, entertainment or just a movie to peek your curiosity. That is dangerous. There are women that are afraid to leave. Some never get that option. We read about them in the headlines

.http://crimeblog.dallasnews.com/2013/01/police-arrest-suspect-name-victim-in-shooting-at-ut-southwestern-parking-garage.html/,

http://www.irishmirror.ie/news/irish-news/crime/brave-daughter-bare-knuckle-boxer-who-

5142288,http://www.morningjournal.com/general-news/20150209/ohio-students-death-underscores-domestic-dangers( this one especially fits)

“When that victim tries to remove herself from the control, he’s going to up the ante,” said Nancy Neylon, executive director for the Ohio Domestic Violence Network.

That control can first manifest in such areas as wanting to decide where the person goes, spends free time, or even dresses.

“That’s absolutely where it starts,” Neylon said. “Even victims who have been physically battered talk about that emotional control as the worst part.”

(So romantic I think I’ll go grab popcorn and a huge soda to read that article.)

The sad part are the moms going to see this movie.I know I’ve heard you talk about this hot scene or that great position, or can you believe… The sad part is yes they’re people who can believe and they are so afraid looking for a way out. Young girls, older women, the unfortunate thing is there is no age discrimination in sex crimes. I suspect if this had happened to them they would not be in line, no they’d join me and my friends who are sick that people think this is acceptable. I am a happily married women with a past I’d like to forget and it definitely has not been easy but, maybe we need to go back to the definition of what love means.Love is not Dominance and Submission. Love is two flesh becoming ONE flesh. Giving to each other. (Funny I thought women HATED submission.)I would never purposefully abuse my own flesh. Maybe just maybe you have been told a lie about what love is and what pleasure is. I wish I could appeal to your conscience, but I can’t. It seems you checked that at the ticket counter.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

stock-photo-woman-victim-of-domestic-violence-and-abuse-husband-intimidates-his-wife-focus-on-the-arm-with-a-112442102

Fifty Shades of Abuse. That’s where it starts.( oh wait she’s not wearing a negligee.)

Whatever happened to community?

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So the year is coming to end for most homeschoolers. I’m not in the do school year round camp. Keep your “gifted children.” I’m making memories with my kids. That being said a lot of blogs are talking about how easy it is to homeschool. Hmm. I totally disagree. Nothing ever worth anything should be easy. If it doesn’t cost you something, it probably isn’t worth doing. I guess I don’t think homeschooling through seizures,dyslexia, back surgeries, job changes, sickness or lack of family very easy. Maybe I just don’t have that supermom status going for me. Homeschooling might have been easier if I had something essential for all humans, COMMUNITY.
com·mu·ni·ty
kəˈmyo͞onitē/Submit
noun
1.
a group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common.
synonyms: district, region, zone, area, locality, locale, neighborhood; More
a body of nations or states unified by common interests.
2.
a feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals.
“the sense of community that organized religion can provide”

I just went to a homeschool get-together and one friend wanted me to meet another friend. Apparently we live close and this person wanted to have homeschoolers in the area do stuff together. So I walked up to the woman introduced myself. “Hi”, I said. “So and so told me you live close and wanted to get together with homeschoolers. Blah blah.” The usual conversation of what curriculum do you use( which could be a turn off) . So she says,( now remember she wants to get together) “Well maybe some time we could do something in the evening. I am soo busy with blah, blah, blah.” I smile. Nod my head.( Seriously it’s a good thing people do not hear my thoughts) Then today on a homeschool forum/group a woman was complaining about how her kids need friends and she did not want to travel 30 mins to meet people.?????? TRANSLATION- My life is so important and I am SOO busy I really will not make time to connect. I am only complaining but never want to take the time to actually do anything about this. Here’s a little tip for you. You have to leave your house, it helps. The reason you are milk white is because you have forgotten the outdoors exists. (Sarcasm completely my own.)

Now some of you will think I’m being a mean. You got it. I am so sick of excuses. Actually let me give you another scenario. Recently my husband was sick with C-Diff. I have never seen him so sick. I mean he’s usually unstoppable. There’s nothing he won’t get involved in. From being a linemen to farming it’s pretty much open. The last few months he goes to work and comes home to sleep. That’s it. Kind hearted, well meaning people say” if there’s anything we can do for you, let us know”. I know they mean well, but you know what? Do you think I am going to say, “Hey would you fix our broken lawn mower?” How about, “The tree fell in our back yard, will you cut it up?” If we are all honest we don’t want to burden anyone as much as they really don’t want to be burdened. So imagine my surprise when I look out my back window and see a 67 year old man cutting up the tree in my backyard.( who was just diagnosed with Lyme disease) Then imagine my surprise when two more neighbors (who are close to 70) grew and gave us plants for our garden. They knew my husband was sick and took it upon themselves to grow and give us plants. Community.

There was a time Long, Long, ago when people helped each other, WITHOUT being asked. Somewhere along the way we have forgotten that we are not the most important thing in the world. God actually does not need us. Amazing thought. You can be replaced. I love homeschooling and I am a Christian, but I think it’s sad that Christians can be the last ones to actually have community. Seriously the homeschooling community can get so involved in their all important busy lives that they forget that there are needy people, and life is not all about them.( Who knew?)

People often say that New Englanders are cold. I hear it all the time. (I live here in North Western PA. Cold is an understatement.) I’m from CT. When I lived there I regularly had invites to dinner, parties and fellowships at church. We laughed and hung out till late in the evening. Here the only invites I get are from , well no one. I know tons of people and have many”friends”. TOO BUSY? Do you know there is not a weekend that goes by where someone is not at my house. Do you think it’s because we are super Christians? Haha. Nope, I just know that everyone needs someone. We cannot thrive as islands. We are needy people and if I can do one thing to help someone on this journey called life, then that’s what I will do. I want to be clear. I am a Christian. I love Jesus, the Bible and God’s people…but we all need some improvement in this area. Don’t preach that we are the hands and feet of Jesus and then sit on your hands and feet. Get off your butt and change the world.( Please stop saying we have to get together sometime. You are a liar. You don’t even mean it) How about that neighbor down the road or the friend who is going through a divorce. Okay, so you don’t agree with divorce( most people don’t until they find themselves getting divorced) Do you honestly think they thought it would turn out like this? Help them move. Send them cards. Please don’t say I’m praying for you and never connect again. Life is hard enough. Stop asking what can I do for you and go do it.
hos·pi·ta·ble
häˈspitəbəl,ˈhäspitəbəl/Submit
adjective
friendly and welcoming to strangers or guests.
“two friendly, hospitable brothers run the hotel”
synonyms: welcoming, friendly, congenial, genial, sociable, convivial, cordial, courteous; More

I also want to add what it means to be HOSPITABLE. We had missionaries at our house. It’s common at our house to make a basket up for vistors so they don’t feel funny always asking for food or drink etc.. We also make big breakfasts and homemade food for meals. You get our undivided attention. We do not keep doing what we always do. We stop and we make you the focus. That’s what I thought others did too, but people we need to go back to Hospitality 101. These missionaries thanked us profusely. They said the last 5 places left them donuts and granola bars for breakfast. Not that they were un-thankful but, Hello, used tea bags anyone? They were left alone until it was time to preach. Now come on. We preach that to help the least of these is serving Christ. The preacher gets up and announces the missionary and we all assume they have been taken care of and the Pastor knows the missionary well. Is it really that hard to stop being a self centered and focus on something besides yourself? If our lives are a vapor and we are made from dirt, who in the name of all that’s good do you really think you are? I guess making eggs is so laborious, and making a salad or some homemade meal is incredibly hard. My husband and I were just talking about places we went to where it was as if we were not there. I mean we knew we were there but our”hosts” apparently were so important that they could not even take time out for us.Their daily lives could not stop. I mean what would happen? The world would fall apart if you did not( fill in the blank.) God forbid I ever do that to someone. Remember
mayaangelou

Silence is complicity.

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Part of home educating my kids is that I have opportunities to address issues that show up. We discuss these issues at length. Some issues are more adultish in manner , but I have never talked to my children as if they are intellectually inferior. They are adults in the making. I am not raising children. I am raising adults. Sometimes the hard issues come up. Sometimes I am forced to talk about things I don’t want to talk about. I can’t talk about. I think its time though for me to finally just address this kind of issue.

I am originally from Sandy Hook, CT. A virtually unknown place until the tragic murdering of precious innocence. I lived about two minutes from the school. I rode my bike past that school many times to go to the Deli( where I bought candy) or the pizza place. Everyone says Newtown is a safe town. That tragedy never happened there. As if evil had passed over it because, well didn’t you see the news? The picture perfect town. Postcard image. Except I lived in a 550 square ft. house in the less fortunate side of Newtown. My parents were divorced and well sometimes my life was not a picture perfect postcard. The thing with safety is it’s deceiving. Silence from evil does not mean it is non-existent. I have hidden a secret the whole time I went through the school system. No-one knew.
I had been molested by a 16-year-old babysitter . He also threatened to kill me and to make sure I knew it( and because he was sick and crazy) threw me in our dryer and turned it on. Don’t worry though everyone said I wouldn’t remember. Oh and that teenager.. the social worker said he was a good boy. I don’t have all the pieces as to why the Newtown police department did not arrest him and throw him in jail but let me assure you, your brain NEVER forgets.

Two days ago I was scrolling Facebook , the internet etc.. and an old video from Sandy Hook showed up. I watched it just because my heart breaks for Sandy Hook. I hate evil. Almost to the end of the video a man says“I am for strict gun control…blah blah blah….” I look below at the description of the interview. He looked familiar.His name. Oh God. There he was. Speaking about gun control. My hands were shaking so bad, I felt sick. I immediately thought of his sister, whom he also molested. I heard from an old neighbor that she took her own life. I wonder why. Here he was free. Yet when someone has had trauma, or abuse forced upon them they are never really free. The mind is an amazing thing. It remembers the things you ignore and pretend never existed. Which I did.

So our conversation, the one my children and I have been having is about Silence. Can you hear it? I walk out to our field every morning with my daughter. We feed our horses and cow. It is a refreshing walk down the trail into the field the neighbors called “the hidden field” . Our dog Rocky comes with us. He bounces around chasing all the things we can’t see because they are hidden in silence. Every once in a while a deer will come flying out of nowhere and bound off it the woods. She was there, the whole time, but we never saw her. Silence in the face of evil is not standing up to the evil , it is complicity to the evil. Pretending it is not there does not make it go away. Trust me. I tried. To say to someone who has been abused don’t talk about it, we’ll just ignore it, is just allowing the evil to continue. Do you know that a monster shows up when you least expect it.In the darkness. Let me tell you he’s shown up in my life more than I care to say.
The statistics out are 1 in 4 for females to be sexually abused before the age of 14. Seriously people does anyone not just inhale and forget to breathe here??? This is happening in our churches as well. When Pastors are told not to report the evil, I think the world has gone mad. The church should be the refuge for the broken, the abused, instead you will find time and time again the women silenced and the perpetrator is allowed to continue his deeds. The fact that my two best friends have similar pasts and that about a month ago a man sat at my table who was sexually abused by a PASTOR, makes me want to VOMIT. Heres the thing, if you think I protect my kids. This won’t happen to them. Uncle, Grandparent, babysitter and Pastor. Anything here about a psycho pedophile? Does he look creepy with dark eyes and tattoos? No, he is someone you know. He is your friend, your relative, your trusted advisor . When females remain the object for man to buy and sell. When hollywood and the world makes the female a commodity she is only good for one thing, her body, she is marketable. It does not matter if they tell you to have self-esteem. The Victoria Secret models flaunt it for all the world to see’ Here I am come buy me”. Prepare your little girls too. Make men desire them. When our tv and Movies just show females as nothing but a body, no wonder a depraved mind can’t get his fill. He will not be reformed. They never are.

Please do not tell me just Trust God. I cannot even tell you how much that is a cop-out. Please tell me, What the heck does that MEAN?? When I wake up in the middle of the night and my monster was real, can you please tell me how that will clear my mind? Does that help me when I’m in an MRI machine and all I can think is,” I’m being cooked to death. I can hear it.” Does that help me when you tell me some horrific story about child abuse and I want to scream at you and say”Stop! Stop! I can’t listen. Don’t tell me.” I instantly have a wave of fear and panic come over me. Does it help me not feel his breath when I kiss my husband? Stop saying stupid things. Christ has been the One light in my life, but don’t use Christian clichés as an excuse to not help the struggling and abused. We think you are an idiot.

So here’s the thing everyone always says you have to talk about it. That’s funny. The more I have been talking about it , the more I have been getting SILENCE.Yes you’d think support, but people either don’t want to feel guilty or they just don’t care. So here it all is. Once it’s out there it’s out there. I hate it. It’s vulnerability and that’s something I never want to be. Ugh. I did this for the start of my journey to stand up and stop being quiet about the things that matter. There are other little girls and boys out there who have been silenced. If my two closest friends have the same background and I have met them at different points in my life , can you imagine the others. It really needs to stop. The condescendng talk towards women in general needs to stop. I will not teach my kids to be complicit. This is also for them. They get to be free from monsters. Stop being silent. Women are just as guilty as men, especially in the church. If you know someone going through any kind of abuse emotional, physical, sexual they need you.They need counseling from a professional. Encourage them to go. Don’t say” I don’t want to get involved.” Don’t agree not to talk about it. Stand up . Speak out. SILENCE IS COMPLICITY.

For such a time as this.

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I usually write just for myself. It’s my time in the morning to get clarity. The kids are sleeping. The house is dark. I actually can barely see the keys. I make plenty of mistakes, but I do it for myself. I enjoy it. Today not so much. Today my heart is a mixed load of sadness and blessings. Today some very important people in my eldest sons life are moving. Don’t get me wrong they have a great opportunity. God opened a door and I think it’s great. Sometimes someone elses blessing can become your trial..in a good, bad sort of way?

The first time my son came to the teen group Daniel was unsure and hurt. His once happy full of life self had been defeated and we were unsure if we should even let him go. Mr. B took Daniel in and made him feel right at home( a choice he may have regretted:O) Daniel would come home from teen group every Wed. and discuss the lesson in the car. He’d ask what we thought. He was totally engaged. He never felt like a teenager was to be silenced or at any moment was going to be rebellious, because we all know that’s what teenagers are. Mr. B talked to Daniel like a human being. Like he was important. If there was anything in this world he could not miss it was the teen group. It wasn’t because of the teens, it was because of Mr. B.

The one thing I appreciated about Mr. B is his willingness to allow the kids to question. To ask those hard things every teen struggles with. He did not shoot them down as heretics or unchristian. It was okay to just say I don’t know. He laughed and smiled and the teens loved him. He didn’t prove he was a man by strength or outward things, but by love and an inward love for God. He did not pretend to be who he was not.

I know Daniel was challenged intellectually. He looked for the loophole. He never just accepts the Christian answer. He always will challenge. Mr. B allowed(most) of his challenges.(If he allowed all, they would be there all night, Daniel can Talk. Haha) That led Daniel to a deeper study of God. Had he quieted that in him. It would have turned him away.

His wife Sarah gave just as much as he did. She was always baking and doing things for the teens. The teens became part of their family. I know Daniel felt awful because he wanted to say something to you publicly on Sunday. So this is his forum. I’ve seen his struggles. I know the real truth. I know how spiritually broken he really was when we came to you guys. I also know the tears he cried when he found out you were leaving. Daniel is not ashamed to cry. I want you to know that you have impacted lives here. My prayer is that you go and impact more Daniels. Thank you from a grateful mom. Thank you for showing my son, The Savior.

Go outside and play.

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My husband and I had a visit to the ER yesterday. We knew this one was coming . It was only a matter of time. When you encourage your kids to “get off their butts and live”( that means go outside) . Something is going to happen. If something is going to happen it’s going to happen to Joel.

Winter all around has been extremely frigid. I don’t mind snow. I don’t mind cold. I do mind temps. below 20 degrees. It has been brutal. The kids go out for ten minutes and they come right back in ,of course that leads to the most ridiculous fighting you have ever heard. If it’s not a fight, they make one up. Thank God for winter activities (indoors.) Anyway usually when one of our children pulls a really dumb stunt, we the parents get scrutinized. You know it’s better to allow your child to sit and eat chips while playing Grand Theft Auto ,than let them climb a tree. ( I don’t recommend jumping off bridges into snow piles, on frozen ponds. BAD IDEA). I was pleasantly surprised yesterday.

I walked into the room and the doctor told me his name. I took a deep breath. My husband was still parking the car. He said, “so Joel how did you hurt your foot?” Joel’s smile is infectious. It makes me smile. He says, “I jumped off a bridge”. The doctor looks at me. I smile. It’s a nervous habit. I know he’s picturing the George Washington Bridge,George_Washington_Bridge_NY but really it’s just a little bridge on a country road. So Joel tells him he was jumping in the snow with friends. He’s the only one who hurts his foot.The doctor says,(with kind eyes) “Well I am sorry your foot is hurt but kids should be outside in the snow. We see a lot of kids who play outside regularly. That’s how it should be. Let’s get an X-ray.” His foot ended up being broken in two places. He’s pretty tough when it comes to things like falling from trees, being chased by bulls, making a goal running full speed on a 95 degree day . Joel just has endurance. If he can’t walk. He broke it.

I think back to a conversation and a video. We were watching this :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYw4meRWGd4
Joel watched this and said “I want to be the first one to break his record.” Thinking about that now I don’t know if he was serious or not, but I’m thinking I might be on a first name basis with the ER doctors. It’s going to be a long 8 weeks. Long enough for him to finally sit and take the photography class I tried to get him to take. Yes, that means no pictures hanging upside down from trees, or in the middle of the swamp, but I’m sure he can find something to film on crutches…..Joel Barker 2014 029

All credit goes to Joel. Who sees beauty in everything.

Dislxiu

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I wonder if when a person hits the “post” button they have actually let those words filter through their brain. Are people so desperate for recognition that they have let the whole world know that they are clearly superior intellectually or can they just let it slip?( which I clearly am not) I see the posts everyday. People telling other people the different types of there’s. People telling others how and when to use commas.( what a badge of honor. Thank you so much!!!) The person let’s you know that they have the awful burden to notice every grammar mistake on a sign at a grocery store. People seriously we all know auto correct messes up half of what we say and others are human errors. Then I’ll see one that grabs my heart because I have taught one his whole life. The spelling errors are all over the place. People will tear this one up. I think to myself how did he slip through the cracks?
dyslexia bubble
I know how people slip through because I just heard another story. My husband was talking to someone Who said the first key words” “I hate reading”. He actually has been through college and is now in a good paying job. Your thinking so he hates reading.He has a job, the worst you can say is that? He was asking my husband” how do you spell..this, and this.?” My husband finally started asking questions. He struggled all through school. Spelling was not his best subject. He hated reading. Of course the public school assigns you remedial reading because obviously when you already can’t read you should read more? It’s the same old broken system that has never worked. He got pushed through. He found a way . To get where he is today he had to struggle , work twice as hard and rely on friends. His teachers thought he was dumb. His word problems in math looked like hieroglyphics. No one knew to call it dyslexia.
dyslexia-shirt
With the introduction of the Common Core and all of its assessments I can’t imagine a dyslexic student in the public school. The race to the top initiative is leaving people behind. Students like this. I guess though the public school is set up that way. That is why we homeschool. My son is not going to be left behind while others race to the top. The President may have sounded good with his eloquent speech but his children get their education paid for. Most dyslexic students need very expensive tutoring. The intervention required in the public school is usually not adequate. Most parents turn to private tutoring. I myself love it when homeschoolers say “let the children educate themselves.” I’m sure that will work very well for my son who is dyslexic. There is an element of independence, but to completely allow unmonitored schooling is hogwash.

I used to really worry that we were not doing the right thing. Progress was slow. My son was struggling so bad. Every dyslexia specialist has a different technique they prefer and it’s crazy trying to discern what works best for your child. I was told by someone who was an expert that certain things we were doing would not work. Only their program worked. Their program was thousands! We were already spending that much. We just slowly plodded along because our son liked what he was doing and fought us on the experts program. Guess what? We are seeing tremendous progress. The new spelling curriculum we got has also helped. It’s slow, tedious, repetitive. He actually loves it. He’s gone up a grade level in reading and comprehension. I’m more excited about the comprehension part. He actually is reading the King James Bible with his Dad every night ( if you have ever seen a King James Bible, please clap with me now).I also love, love the immersion narration from Kindle . It’s an option with some of their books and replaces the robotic like reading my son HATED. He would not even bother trying to read along with those TERRIBLE narrations. He was last heard reading along with Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer on some adventure. Who would have thought that possible? In case you are wondering about my title. He spelled that.He will never be “cured” of dyslexia. He is always going to have an element of struggle.He most likely will be a poor speller his whole life. Aside from his dyslexia I’m more proud of him for something else. I told him about this korean pastor who started this box in Korea so that people could come and bring orphans. The people came they dropped babies off in the box and the Pastor and his wife took care of them. My son said to me” Mom when I grow up I want to go there and adopt those children and help that Pastor. Why doesn’t anyone want those babies? I was telling him about the Pastor and the good he was doing, he was focused on the need of the children to have parents. That’s my son. Always seeing the hurt in others. Struggles only become a handicap if you let them.
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Instrument for You.

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It’s been one of those days. I know you have had them. When everything you have tried to do just seemed to fall apart. . My car broke, I had to cancel a doctor’s appointment, we had some homeschooling “issues” and on Facebook everyone had a comment on everything. If you didn’t line up exactly , well you must not be a fill in the blank. What in the world is wrong?

The cold weather is biting like a bee sting. Something inside feels off. I read it in people’s posts. The perfect homeschool post, the perfect christian post, the post in response to the post I posted post, diets, curriculum, politics, confusion, is there a God? On and on the madness ensues. Meanwhile my friend’s life is falling apart( while I get to homeschool my kids and have a great marriage) and all I can do is pray.Is this really how it should be?

But I have to just let the madness continue. Sometimes ignoring what others think and say is the only way to be an instrument for You. Approval is overrated.I don’t want to be an instrument for a cause or denomination. Just You.

Tonight I saw His sunset and felt His crisp air in my lungs.I couldn’t help but think, Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD. Praise ye the LORD. Psalm 150:6

The world cannot hate us. We are to busy following it.

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I had an old Pastor that used to pray something like this” Lord I pray that I have been a pure enough vessel that You would speak through me today.“(which is so rare these days) He did not want his flesh to get in the way. It’s so easy you know. To let our old stinking selves to become the main focus. I mean just look at any Homeschool convention. You would think they were about the heart and mind of our children. When the first speakers showing up are speakers on weight-loss programs( the latest trend this year) . It’s seriously time to evaluate things. I’m sick over this. I was looking into two. One of my children is leaning toward a medical field and I was checking out two VERY opposite types. I already made it clear I love Tom Woods. I was taught Economics wrong. I listen to his podcasts and his talks on freedom etc. However I learned the convention he was going to was having Dr. Ben Carson. It is close to the Creation Museum and we would be able to visit the Columbus Zoo which my daughter ( who wants to be a zoologist) really wants to visit. I decided on this after looking at the “weight loss” convention though. That was started by missionaries and yes it has other great speakers. I went down the list and was not impressed. I know why we are losing the battle for homeschoolers . It’s right to educate the heart, but there was more of a focus on the body then the mind………..?????????PFT I need more coffee.

As a mom I have a responsibility to train my kids for the next generation. The last thing I need is for me to go to a convention and hear Another weight-loss program. Sure health is important, but Christians are the worst at preaching “don’t follow the fashion of the world’, than having 20 Vera Bradley purses.Ouch. Yes that’s the truth isn’t it. We tell people we don’t need to have soup kitchens, just tell them about Jesus.( Insert eyeroll HERE!) Americans don’t even know what a hunger pain is. We don’t need a diet plan. We need to get off our butt and live what we believe. In doing so our kids will see it. How about growing your own food? . Ditch the coupons. All you buy is processed junk with them anyway. Did you ever see someones stock pile? NO. Thanks.

Then all these bloggers telling me to live victorious lives.Accept yourself as the child of God.HA! Except they all follow each other or someone else. If one guy is popular every women shares his blog. Which makes me ill. If one preacher writes a book. People with no brains and obviously low self-esteem flock to him. They forget CONTEXT IS KING. Ditch 400 years of research and believe they are now slaves under a God who is some kind of Master. Sorry Gal 5. You don’t really mean we are under liberty. Sorry John 8:36 still a slave. Oh, and that wage of sin you were working for. You apparently are still under a master. Only slaves are working. Still in bondage because John MacArthur is smarter than the King James translators. They had no idea what they were doing. It was a conspiracy! Sorry John MacArthur I willingly serve my Lord. I willingly knelt at the feet of Jesus Christ.Slaves don’t work willingly. Just a little FYI. He redeemed me off the auction block of sin. He bought me back and SET ME FREE. So please take your false doctrine out of the church. You have been deceiving people for far too long. No, Jesus is not my buddy, but He is my friend (John 15:15), my Abba, my Lord , my God and so many other things. You cannot change God’s word to control a people.

So here’s why I wrote this; Christians do not just follow every thing that blows in. I don’t care if 5,000 people are at the service and your heart is moved. If the guy is weak and anemic. Please go study your Bible. Dig deeper. Women Far too long I have listened to you ask the dumbest questions in church. I think to myself if these women are training the next generation” God help us.” If you are acting dumb on purpose. STOP. The Proverbs 31 woman was not dumb or weak. She was strong and capable. Her husband trusted her( and she also had maidservants which no one wants to point out. If I had maidservants. I’d have time for lot’s of things. Like more gardening maybe going out with a friend. Who knows? The possibilities are endless. You get the point.)

The only way true change will come in this country is a resurgence of real Christianity. Not this weak , anemic, parasite we have now. Where self-government is seen as sin.
Here is a story of a judge in 1842 interviewing a Colonel that was in the battle of Concord.In 1842, Judge Mellen Chamberlain interviewed ninety-one-year-old Captain Preston, a veteran of the Battle of Concord in 1775, to try and establish why Preston had fought against the British (My math calculates this interval to be 67 years, placing the then-young fighting man’s age at around 24).
Judge Chamberlain: Did you take up arms against intolerable oppressions?
Captain Preston replied that he had never felt any oppressions.
Judge Chamberlain: Was it the Stamp Act?
Captain Preston: No, I never saw one of those stamps.
Judge Chamberlain: Was it the tea tax?
Captain Preston again said no.
Judge Chamberlain: Were you reading John Locke and other theorists of liberty?
Captain Preston: Never heard of’em. We read only the Bible, the Catechism, Watt’s Psalms and Hymns, and the Almanac.
Judge Chamberlain: Why, then, did you fight?
Captain Preston: Young man, what we meant in going for those Redcoats, was this: We always had governed ourselves, and we always meant to. They didn’t mean we should.

Maybe we should take a lesson from that Colonel. If we keep focusing on weight-loss programs and not on the heart of the matter. Christ taught personal liberty. The right of every man and woman to govern themselves. We all be accountable for ourselves before God. You are to examine yourself. The founders knew this. They knew they ought to obey God rather than man.Do you know why they were so hated. They were so different. Why is it taking nuns to stand up to a ruling tyrant. Christians are so entrenched in this world they have forgotten where they came from. Let me remind you.
John 15:19 If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you.12 disciples
Dialogue from ‘The Politically Incorrect Guide to American History’ by Prof. Thomas E. Woods, Jr., Phd.