Monthly Archives: June 2014

Whatever happened to community?

Video

So the year is coming to end for most homeschoolers. I’m not in the do school year round camp. Keep your “gifted children.” I’m making memories with my kids. That being said a lot of blogs are talking about how easy it is to homeschool. Hmm. I totally disagree. Nothing ever worth anything should be easy. If it doesn’t cost you something, it probably isn’t worth doing. I guess I don’t think homeschooling through seizures,dyslexia, back surgeries, job changes, sickness or lack of family very easy. Maybe I just don’t have that supermom status going for me. Homeschooling might have been easier if I had something essential for all humans, COMMUNITY.
com·mu·ni·ty
kəˈmyo͞onitē/Submit
noun
1.
a group of people living in the same place or having a particular characteristic in common.
synonyms: district, region, zone, area, locality, locale, neighborhood; More
a body of nations or states unified by common interests.
2.
a feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals.
“the sense of community that organized religion can provide”

I just went to a homeschool get-together and one friend wanted me to meet another friend. Apparently we live close and this person wanted to have homeschoolers in the area do stuff together. So I walked up to the woman introduced myself. “Hi”, I said. “So and so told me you live close and wanted to get together with homeschoolers. Blah blah.” The usual conversation of what curriculum do you use( which could be a turn off) . So she says,( now remember she wants to get together) “Well maybe some time we could do something in the evening. I am soo busy with blah, blah, blah.” I smile. Nod my head.( Seriously it’s a good thing people do not hear my thoughts) Then today on a homeschool forum/group a woman was complaining about how her kids need friends and she did not want to travel 30 mins to meet people.?????? TRANSLATION- My life is so important and I am SOO busy I really will not make time to connect. I am only complaining but never want to take the time to actually do anything about this. Here’s a little tip for you. You have to leave your house, it helps. The reason you are milk white is because you have forgotten the outdoors exists. (Sarcasm completely my own.)

Now some of you will think I’m being a mean. You got it. I am so sick of excuses. Actually let me give you another scenario. Recently my husband was sick with C-Diff. I have never seen him so sick. I mean he’s usually unstoppable. There’s nothing he won’t get involved in. From being a linemen to farming it’s pretty much open. The last few months he goes to work and comes home to sleep. That’s it. Kind hearted, well meaning people say” if there’s anything we can do for you, let us know”. I know they mean well, but you know what? Do you think I am going to say, “Hey would you fix our broken lawn mower?” How about, “The tree fell in our back yard, will you cut it up?” If we are all honest we don’t want to burden anyone as much as they really don’t want to be burdened. So imagine my surprise when I look out my back window and see a 67 year old man cutting up the tree in my backyard.( who was just diagnosed with Lyme disease) Then imagine my surprise when two more neighbors (who are close to 70) grew and gave us plants for our garden. They knew my husband was sick and took it upon themselves to grow and give us plants. Community.

There was a time Long, Long, ago when people helped each other, WITHOUT being asked. Somewhere along the way we have forgotten that we are not the most important thing in the world. God actually does not need us. Amazing thought. You can be replaced. I love homeschooling and I am a Christian, but I think it’s sad that Christians can be the last ones to actually have community. Seriously the homeschooling community can get so involved in their all important busy lives that they forget that there are needy people, and life is not all about them.( Who knew?)

People often say that New Englanders are cold. I hear it all the time. (I live here in North Western PA. Cold is an understatement.) I’m from CT. When I lived there I regularly had invites to dinner, parties and fellowships at church. We laughed and hung out till late in the evening. Here the only invites I get are from , well no one. I know tons of people and have many”friends”. TOO BUSY? Do you know there is not a weekend that goes by where someone is not at my house. Do you think it’s because we are super Christians? Haha. Nope, I just know that everyone needs someone. We cannot thrive as islands. We are needy people and if I can do one thing to help someone on this journey called life, then that’s what I will do. I want to be clear. I am a Christian. I love Jesus, the Bible and God’s people…but we all need some improvement in this area. Don’t preach that we are the hands and feet of Jesus and then sit on your hands and feet. Get off your butt and change the world.( Please stop saying we have to get together sometime. You are a liar. You don’t even mean it) How about that neighbor down the road or the friend who is going through a divorce. Okay, so you don’t agree with divorce( most people don’t until they find themselves getting divorced) Do you honestly think they thought it would turn out like this? Help them move. Send them cards. Please don’t say I’m praying for you and never connect again. Life is hard enough. Stop asking what can I do for you and go do it.
hos·pi·ta·ble
häˈspitəbəl,ˈhäspitəbəl/Submit
adjective
friendly and welcoming to strangers or guests.
“two friendly, hospitable brothers run the hotel”
synonyms: welcoming, friendly, congenial, genial, sociable, convivial, cordial, courteous; More

I also want to add what it means to be HOSPITABLE. We had missionaries at our house. It’s common at our house to make a basket up for vistors so they don’t feel funny always asking for food or drink etc.. We also make big breakfasts and homemade food for meals. You get our undivided attention. We do not keep doing what we always do. We stop and we make you the focus. That’s what I thought others did too, but people we need to go back to Hospitality 101. These missionaries thanked us profusely. They said the last 5 places left them donuts and granola bars for breakfast. Not that they were un-thankful but, Hello, used tea bags anyone? They were left alone until it was time to preach. Now come on. We preach that to help the least of these is serving Christ. The preacher gets up and announces the missionary and we all assume they have been taken care of and the Pastor knows the missionary well. Is it really that hard to stop being a self centered and focus on something besides yourself? If our lives are a vapor and we are made from dirt, who in the name of all that’s good do you really think you are? I guess making eggs is so laborious, and making a salad or some homemade meal is incredibly hard. My husband and I were just talking about places we went to where it was as if we were not there. I mean we knew we were there but our”hosts” apparently were so important that they could not even take time out for us.Their daily lives could not stop. I mean what would happen? The world would fall apart if you did not( fill in the blank.) God forbid I ever do that to someone. Remember
mayaangelou